Survey III. (Pointless)
Please answer the following questions:
1) What is your favorite food?
2) If you had to be stuck on a desert island with Ben and J-lo, or just Gary Coleman (who would still be a security guard), which would you pick (warning: Gary may have legitimate jurisdiction over you, and Ben and J-lo don't have any of their money, and they hate each other)?
3) What is your favorite pointless question?
4) What is your favorite non-pointless question and how does it differ from a pointless one?
5) Are any of the above questions non-pointless?
6) What city do you wish you could have been born in?
7) If you had to have a terminal illness that would claim you in less than 5 years, what illness would it be (those who are terminally ill are exempt from this question)?
8) Boxers or briefs?
9) Is question #8 the paradigmatic pointless question of this lot, or is there another contender (#1?) for this position? Why?
10) If you had precient knowledge about the fact that the earth would soon temporarily start rotating about its axis at a speed three times greater than its current rate, what preparations would you make (It would spin up to the new speed during the first minute, maintain that speed for 40 minutes, and then spin down to the normal speed during the last minute)?
11) Must questions about pointless questions be themselves pointless?
4 Comments:
[Sorry folks, but I'll have to refer to myself for the duration of this respose]
1) Either pad thai (Thai), complex sushi (japanese), or yellow curry, chicken (indian).
2) I'd kill myself before getting to know any of them anyway, so I'd pick Ben and J-Lo, because I'
d rather have my corpse freak them out.
3) 'So, what's you major?' (Not really pointless, but it infuriates me that I have to ask this of my friends when I forget what their studying.)
4) 'What is the best explaination for our (and our universe's/multiverse's/cosmos's) formation/existence?' Partial answers to this question and questions like it will presumably allow us to further our mastering of reality, which is a good (and possibly neccessary) thing ;).
5) I don't know thats a hard one.
6) Goleta, CA. I was born is Santa Barbara, unfortunately.
7) Kevin, your and idiot.
8) Both: there is a time and a place for all underwear.
9) Yes, #8 is one of the most pointless questions that a human being could ask.
10) I would build an anti-gravity pod out of unobtainium, and then use this pod to float safely above the surface of the earth as it spins so quickly below me. I would also make a high resolution recording of the chaos ensuing below to be sold for top dollar to the survivors back on earth.
1.) Varies.
2.) Ben and J-Lo. I would stone Ben, then have my way with the round assed lady. It would be a consiquence free romp, and a good way to pass the time on the island.
3.) "Margarine or butter?"
4.) "How you get so big eating food of this kind?" It differs from a pointless question becuase Yoda, who spaketh it, is a solid little mongrel.
5.) I'm confused. Are you referring to your meta-questions about questions? Or are we talking about the questions that I have created in response to your meta-queries. It doesn't really matter though because they are all pointless.
6.) I wish I had been born in the heart of the midwest along with the rest of my white brothers in "Pridesville, New America".
7.) Does this have to be a real illness? All that I would really prefer would be one that isn't painful and wasting. Oh, and I wan't to retain my mental abilities.
8.) bachsoars
9.) #1 and #8 are both up there.
10.) How much warning do I have? I would try to warn the world, which would most likely fail. Then I would try to make sure that friends and loved ones were packed away tightly in my shed so that when I return from orbit they will be ripe for slaughter and consumption.
11.) No. Meta reasoning, and the understanding of pointless questions can allow us to move beyond the pointlessness and discuss more pointed issues.
-Guru Drew aka Skwirl E. Bastard
1) Mexican Food.
2) J-Lo and Ben. It seems wrong, but here's the thing, I think I could kill them both and eat their flesh to sustain my life-force.
3) "What is your favorite pointless question?"
4) Ah, I see you cannot get away from analysis, this should be a purely fanciful activity.
5) They are all simply to enhance your knowledge, not understanding, about who is responding. Except maybe that last one. Stupid meta-question.
6) Now, that's an interesting question. I refuse to answer on those grounds.
7) How about a heart attack in my sleep? I know it's not considered traditionally terminal, but think about it and get back to me.
8) gay gay gay
9) Question 8 is the architypal stupid question. Number one is not as bad because it doesn't limit you to two choices.
10) Smoke something. Beside that, I have no comment.
11) Oh of course not. That's like asking "Can you ask a deep, meaningful question about Star Wars?" Of course you can.
That was just me (josh) who answered--if you couldn't already figure it out
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